What is your dream?
When I was little, I had all these odd dreams. I wanted to be something, someone, more than who I am. For a period of time, I was into arts, I thought, I could be an artist (well, not at all). Then I was into peace-keeping (don't ask me why). I dreamed of keeping the Isralis from killing all the Palestinians (and then I grew up, got to know more about the world, and discovered the disgusting truth behind it all).
So many things... But narrowing it down, there's one thing I knew was my tool in life, and that is Writing. There's one thing I know I want to do, and that is contribute.
If we talk about the kind of life I want to lead. Then I would be able to say easily. For the majority of my life I have been fascinated with one idea, to live and teach or contribute in Africa. Don't ask me why, but it's just something that... I dream about. Africa or South America or Inner China.
For a moment, I might have given it up. Listening to all the great talks about all the riches in life. The glamour, the glory, etc.
Now... I am going towards another path, of something I know will lead me near that dream. Then I realized, how much I want it. How much, I want to be that someone I am meant to be.
If there is GOD, in which case, I believe there is, He had once said... to spread your love and warmth around the world, so that no corner will be cold.
And so I smile, knowing, that it is my fate and life to smile. I drive on, knowing that it is my mission to do so.
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Corny as it sounds. But dinner first, finish later.
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A Contemporary Eden
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All contents (except by my lovely readers/commentors ((e or o?))) here are property of Eve Afeline. Although there's nothing to steal, I thought I'd make that straight anyways. That... and of use to her humble little maid, Naomi.
1 comment:
Sometimes I complained the situation what I experienced, like too late to met Counseling, too late to broken out self-limited, too late to ask for help (or advices), too late to trust that if someone always guided me, he would supply all I need.
Actually everything occurred to me was beneficial or had some meaning.
If I didn’t judge they were good or bad quickly, those people, things, even emotion would reveal their positive influence soon or later. And I guessed most things had positive sides and negative sides. (Of course there were something too negative, let this sentence in front become cruel. I would say those pains should be comforted, and justice must be done. (How? Well, I think “no truth and repentance, no cure and forgiveness”))
It was difficult saying that some experiences which let me felt suffering were mistakes or not, because they also affected I identified again what I have decided – form Sociology to Socialwork, from Socialwork to Counseling. Maybe one day I will combine those knowledge to help people, who knows?
I learned that opened myself and let others change my thought, which was more helpful than I insisted what I consider it’s correct - usually it’s a prediction that I was resisting to grow up or give up a immature self.
Too many worries I imaged I have to overcome. Maybe they really existed from the past to the future, but at last I knew one thing (fortunately): “Devote oneself to a tiny, graceful mission, and continues it, he/she will see the difference” by a director once worked in 台中縣 after the 921 earthquake for recording the rebuilding story. Like the same thing you experienced, to understand this words made me smile.
It seems those two paragraphs above are conflicting, yet I mean if one thing is changed, it must be for one’s internal direction, and if one thing can’t be changed, it must be for the process of improving oneself.
I think which I can try now is observe what I am doing and believe inner spirit of God will indicate the way, and the grace from him is more than I need. All that things I should do must be touching him, approaching him everyday, although what I practice is always unsuccessful and uncompleted at all.
well, since high school I have been a long time never write in English, and it's never be good. If you feel confused of some sentences (or all of the comment), I will add a Chinese version. XD
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